The Orlando Commandos: Day Three

The Pacers had a reservation for a Character Breakfast at the Grand Floridian restaurant, 1900 Park Fare. A character meal is where various costumed characters such as Mickey Mouse and Winnie-the-Pooh walk around and have pictures taken with the patrons and sign autographs. Obviously, it's geared for children, but they'll pose and interact with adults, too. The characters for this particular meal was Gepetto, Pinocchio, Alice (in Wonderland) and The Mad Hatter.

So, the Pacers were at breakfast waiting for the characters to come by, when Mac got an idea: When they stop to give autographs, let the kids give them The Gabesabre to use as a pen. Some backstory: Several months ago, Kari found out that blue was Gabriel's favorite color, and she has been obsessed with the color blue ever since. So as a present from the Solsbury Committee to Kari, Mac got her a special pen that glows with an intense, blue light (see picture). It was dubbed The Gabesabre, aka the Blue Light Speicial. Kari thoughtfully brought it on vacation, and had slipped it inside the camera bag which was brought to the character breakfast.

While Kari had stepped out of the restauarant for a moment, Gepetto came by and Auguste handed him his autograph book and The Gabesabre Pen. Gepetto appeared to be totally fascinated by the pen, and pantomined to "hold on for a second". Then, with pen in hand, he walked out of the restaurant. Mac was trying to come up with a way to explain to Kari how a Disney character just ran off with her precious pen, when Gepetto returned with a page from a Winnie-the-Pooh coloring book. He flipped the page over and wrote "Where did you get this pen?" "From www.thewritersedge.com! It also has a Fisher Space Pen cartridge that allows the user to write upside-down on any surface, even in extreme heat or cold temperatures." Gepetto appeared satisfied with the information, and after entertaining the kids, he moved on to the next table.

Kari came back just in time for Pinocchio to show up. He seemed impressed with The Pen as he held it up to his face and stared at it for a few moments before signing autographs for the kids. After a while, Alice came along and we were all treated to yet another English accent. Her reaction to the Gabesaber? "Oh! What a cool pen!" (What? No "What a curious pen"?) The the Mad Hatter got to the table next to the Pacers and asked the family there, "In England, what time is tea time?" Even though the question wasn't addressed to her, Kari answered, "Ten am and 3 pm." His answer was, "No! It's tea time all the time!" Mac made a special note that English Tea Time must work very much like a Solsburian Coffee Break.

He came by and signed autographs...then slipped the pen inside his pocket. When it was clear he wasn't going to get away with the crime, he slapped it down on the table, "Busted again!"

After the delightful breakfast, everyone decided to go for a swim in the courtyard pool. Auguste played catch with a family from, you guessed it, England, and after a while, Mac decided to get her waterslide fix at the "theme pool" that has a slide, waterfall and pool bar, on the other side of the hotel.

As Mac made her way over to the theme pool, she hear familiar music echoing off the fake rocks and surrounding buildings...it was the beginning to "Red Rain"! Mac then remembered what Kari had said earlier...that on the Pacers' first day at the GF, she found that the pool bar cd changer was set to play a song from So for every seventh song. So Mac decided to loiter by the pool bar until the song was other, before tackling the waterslide when the song changed. However, after "Red Rain", "Sledgehammer" began to play. So Mac decided to sit and enjoy the music for awhile. When "Don't Give Up" played, Mac realized that So was going to be played in it's entirety, and Kari needed to be at the theme pool, like, right now. So while, "That Voice Again" played, Mac ran back to the courtyard pool and informed Kari that she was missing out on a Golden Gabriel Moment.

Kari and Mac quickly made their way over to the theme pool, just in time for "In Your Eyes". They decided now would be a good time for a refreshing drink at the pool bar. As the Solsburians drank strawberry daquiris, they revelled in the fact that they were at Disney, listening to Gabriel tunes by the water, and the realized, it doesn't get any better than this. Sadly, the last song on So ended, but Kari wasn't about to let this be the end of the Gabrielness. She called over the bartender and said, "How can I talk you into playing that cd again?" The bartender, who we learned was named Rick, said, "Well, we just got a new cd changer a couple of days ago, and this new one hold 70 cds. I don't know how to go about finding the one you just heard!" Aside from being impressed that this bar had a cd player that contained 70 cds, Mac marvelled at the odds of deciding to go to the theme pool at the very moment the first song on So was about to be played. Kari and Mac pursuaded (okay, begged) Rick to at least give it a try. After a few moments of going behind the scenes and fiddling with the cd changer, Rick emerged victorious, and "Red Rain" started to play again.

So, Mac and Kari chatted and listened to music and generally savored the moment. Eventually, Joe and the children came over to play have some kiddie cocktails and play in the sand by the beach. They also talked to Rick, who told a story about how, there used to be a guy at Disney who had worked as an audio tech on one of Peter Gabriel's tours. Rick said that he had become friends with Mr. Soundguy, and they went out for lunch one time. Rick picked him up in his car, and noted that the first thing audioguy did was start tweaking his car radio to make the sound better.

After spending some more time at the pool bar, Kari reminded Mac that they had an an assignment to complete.

Several months before the Orlando trip, Kari and Mac decided that this would be a perfect opportunity to perform a sacrifice of sorts. And what better way to have a sacrifice than to ditch unwanted Phil Collins albums? Intruder, Polo, and others contributed several Collins materials for the sacrifice. The problem was in the ceremony details. What would be the best to way execute this sacrifice? Here is a chart of the options explored:

Method	Pros	Cons
Build a bonfire on the GF beach and burn, baby, burn!	Satisfying and can roast marshmellows in the process	Disney security wouldn't like that. Could accidentally burn down the hotel if flames got out of control.
Throw albums into the volcano at the theme pool at the neighboring Polynisian Resort.	Traditional method of sacrifice, and have an excuse to visit the Polynisian pool.	Disney workers probably already thought of people throwing stuff into the volcano, and have taken preventative measures against such efforts.
Take a boatride on the lagoon, and toss the offending items into the lake.	Simplicity.	No one likes polluters. Items could become preserved in the muck at the bottom of the lake, only to be found 10,000 years later by aliens who will then believe we worshiped Phil.
Hide albums in the housekeeping dirty laundry baskets.	Easy plan to carry out, and no one would ever find out who was responsible.	Albums could end up being washed, thus damaging the GF laundry fascilities. Or the albums could be discovered by housekeeping, and then one of them might decide to play the album...and we can't be held responsible for that!

After a period of debate, Kari came up with a relatively simple, yet effective idea: Throw the albums in the trash. After deciding on that option, Mac and Kari put on their Solsburians in Black fedoras, and began the ceremony.

Prior to the sacrifice, Mac did some research at the Church of Peter Gabriel's Tina Chapel, to find inspiration and instructions on how to hold a proper sacrifice.

"Sacrifices, of course, have several different functions.  They can be
an attempt to re-create or somehow access a sacred, mythical
moment or action. They can be a payment for some desired favor,
or payment for some sin.  Or they can be an act of
gratitude--payment for some favor already received.  A sacrifice can
even be all of these things at the same time."

It became clear that they needed to state the purpose of this sacrifice. At first they thought maybe it could be in honor of the future release of Up, but they decided to make the sacrifice an act of gratitiude. They decided it would be to thank the Powers that Be that Gabriel was inspired to leave Genesis, thus allowing Gabriel to achieve his true calling and full potential and preventing Gabriel from being the one who sings "Hold On My Heart".

Mac started by grabbing a 45rpm of "Invisible Touch", standing out on her balcony, and proclaiming her admiration of Gabriel. In the middle of her speech, she was posessed with burning curiosity. What would happen if I were to bend this album? So she did, and vinyl proved to be very pliable. Once a crease was created, Mac then wondered, How much force could I apply to this pliable substance before it broke? Mac decide to test her hypothesis by applying pressure with her foot while the record was on the floor of the balcony. The material proved resilient, but after a few stomps, it finally broke. "Oops! I didn't mean to do that!" Mac said. After all, while disliking Phil, Solsburians are neither hateful nor destructive by nature.

Then it was Kari's turn. She chose to hold up a copy of "Take Me Home" while she gave her testimony. Now, "Take Me Home" was about to get the Death Exemption, simply because PG sings some backup on it. However, since no one can actually hear Gabriel singing on this song, it was decided that it could in fact be sacrificed without violating any Solsburian principles.

Kari began to talk about how Gabriel's music has inspired her and brought together so many people in her life, when she suddenly saw a bug. Kari hates bugs, so she whacked away at it with the only thing readily available, namely the "Take Me Home" single. Much to Kari's chagrin, she broken the lp, the results are to your immediate right. Such a pity.

Pressed for time, the Solsburians took it upon themselves to prepare the rest of the Collins LPs for the sacrifice. Mac placed a post-it note on each album with the message, "If found, please burn." Then they went downstairs and performed the sacrifice.

Here is a photo essay of the sacrifice in progress, titled "Phil Collins Gets Wasted":

Before...	...and After	Old-School Genesis Fans will love this. Invisible Touch is placed where it belongs!

Who Knows What Evil Lurks Within?

The deed done, and feeling quite satisfied, the two felt the need to persue other activities. Kari and Mac decided to do a little shopping, namely buying a birthday gift for a mutual friend of ours. Then, sadly, Mac decided it was finally time to leave the Pacers to the rest of their vacation, which included a week-long Disney cruise. The Pacers promised to keep their vows to be good Solsburians, and Mac wished the Pacers the best of luck in life. After all, it's not just anyone Mac can be able to share a Golden Gabriel Moment and a Collins Sacrifice with.

The End

Back to the Miscellany (or close window)